Murderer…

I am a cold-blooded killer.  Murderer.  An emotionless life taker.  Plague upon the face of gardening.  A black thumb.  If it is living it better not come in the back door because it will be dead in days.  I have even killed a cactus…yes you read that correctly a cactus. You would be amazed at what over watering does to a cactus….

The down side is I enjoy gardening, really I do.  Green things blooming all over, splashes of color overflowing planter boxes, tomato limbs so weighted down with fruit the poor thing starts falling over.  Are you getting the picture?  Well here let me show you another picture, one of what happens to the plants “lucky” enough to enter the backdoor of WikiJan’s house….

Those are the 6th set of 2 Rosemary plants this season to have been unfortunate enough to be picked up by me for “special attention.”  These two plants died in record time…less that 2 weeks.  So I guess you could say I am getting better as I am not prolonging the misery of any plant here.  They are obtaining a quick execution…

Now has that stopped me you ask…  Nope!  I obtained my 7th set of victims today while at Fresh Market, 2 MORE Rosemary plants along with 2 more Dill plants.  This time they went into pots outside in the hopes they will do better in their “Natural” habitat…rriiigghhhttt sure they will… who wants to lay odds they are dead in a week?  Anyone?

I am SO glad that my ability to cook has little to do with my ability to grow my own herbs.  I would LOVE to have a herb garden overflowing with the likes of Thyme, Sage, Marjoram, Dill, Rosemary, Garlic and Basil, just like you would see in 19th century English cottage garden but I just don’t see it happening.  If I don’t kill them then I have Winston The Fat Head Man Dog eating them because he loves the smell, especially the Basil.  He is obsessed with Basil to the point that I have to keep the herbs on the outside of the fence where he can only smell them.  Either way they are doomed to a quick death…by my hand or Winston’s jaws.

So what’s a girl to do… do I continue in with my serial murder-ing spree?  Do I give up in defeat?  Do I bribe someone to grow them for me and swap cooking for herbs?  Well you all know me well enough to know “defeat” is not a word I know very well so I guess I will keep on killing till I get it right or someone takes pity on me and grows them for me…

Now go play with your food.

WikiJan,